Letting go, the theme of the past 4 or 5 months for me... now life sends me the challenge of letting go in a bigger way... River spoke to me of this:

I was breathing in the nature park on yesterday's wet and dewy morning. My four legged dog friend, Buddy, had just finished at the vet and we felt this would be a good way for both of us to unwind and let go. I had been down this particular path about a month prior and was drawn to it again.

As we made our way towards the river I noticed it was particularly loud this morning. Coming closer I found the water was high, muddy & moving quickly. On this last visit there was a large tree lodged against the embankment that I climbed over and viewed many tadpoles coming into their own among the safety of the stagnant branches. The tree was huge and appeared immovable.

It was gone this visit. Completely washed away down the river...

It was then that River spoke to me of letting go. Continually pushing through the small pebbles, the large rocks, the massive trees, all forms of debris never getting anything stuck forever in one place. Slowly carving out canyons and new pathways river changes the world patiently on this journey of continued letting go. It is the stagnant water that is unclean. In it's unmoving nature it harbors danger of disease growing in the unmoving depths but the flowing moving river is clean, safe and naturally renewed daily.

You never see the same river twice. River does not hold still in one place to analyze, to judge, to wallow. River takes joy in the adventure of letting go, moving on, cleaning house and allowing new energy to flow.

Thank you River for your bubbly words!
Today I imagine myself a river. A constant flow of energy. Cleaning and Letting Go with each step.

When the universe sends you wholeness, prepare to listen...

I think my own loving thoughts.

I allow wholeness into our lives.

May it come in and fill each space.

Synchronicity is the experience of two or more events that are causally unrelated occurring together in a meaningful manner. To count as synchronicity, the events should be unlikely to occur together by chance.

I tend to listen/pay attention to synchronicity so I find myself spoken to in this manner often.

Last night, after my talk with my masculine and feminine side, I felt a book I had shelved awhile back calling to me. I dug out The Cherokee Full Circle and turned to the page I left of on (page 28, the age I am about to turn in a little more than a week). That page mentions Switching and Split-self exercises. Interesting.

A friend once suggested to me that I pull up two chairs and have a conversation between my current realized self and my masculine self. This would happen by assigning each a chair and assuming that chair to speak from each perspective.

Today I received an email blog:

Elder's Meditation of the Day - January 21
"This is the time of awakening to the inner father and the inner mother. Without this we will receive no high initiation; instead we get initiated into darkness. That's because any investigation or revolution without God leads, not to freedom, but to more slavery."
--Willaru Huayta, QUECHAU NATION, PERU
Honor the Father and the Mother. Father stands for wisdom and Mother stands for feelings. Inside each of us is the Father and the Mother. If we do not honor both, we will not grow in balance. To honor both the Father and the Mother helps our masculine and feminine sides grow. The winter season is a good time to focus on this. This is our season of reflection. Honoring both sides allows us to see the Creator is both Father and Mother.

Great Spirit, Father Sky, Mother Earth, guide me today. Let me experience balance.
(to receive this blog you can sign up here: http://www.whitebison.org/)

I felt it a sign and decided to try this while alone on lunch break (doing this while alone is probably rather important as it may look strange to speak to ones self while switching between chairs.)

Through this conversation I have stumbled upon a very unsettled male side who seems to disagree or argue with everything my female side comes up with. Why my psyche has done this to itself I do not know. Neither of my parents fought often nor were they argumentative. Perhaps this is something from a past life (inner male would say past lives are a bunch of bull-honky.) It does explain how I have developed such strong arguing skills!

My response was:
"So, I thought what a good day to dialog with my masculine side after receiving these words of wisdom (as seen above). Well... I think he's a big fat jerk so I guess I have some things to work on there =) xo -V

What have I concluded? My inner masculine is the critic, full of ego and the one who insists I doubt everything. I appreciate how he fuels my search for truth with his constant doubting and hope to obtain a balance with this.

Blessings,
V